Who Wins In An Eating Contest?

Sean and I were having a conversation yesterday about how I despise Pablo Sandoval. Sean preferred to use the word “disappointed” to describe his feelings, which, to be fair, is probably worse than disliking.

Mainly, my reasoning is that he’s both out of shape in terms of baseball and out of shape in terms of, like, his physical well-being. Don’t give me this “he’s big-boned” crap or “he’s always been big” or any retort like that. There isn’t a chicken wing or taco that he won’t eat, and that is a fact. And he’s always been like that. He had issues back in his days in San Francisco when he manned third base for the Giants. The big draw to the Red Sox, besides the boatloads of money, was the fact that there wasn’t a weight clause in his contract like the Giants would’ve liked. I think it’s fair to not like a guy whose job is to hit and field a baseball, while making millions upon millions of dollars to do so, but doesn’t do his job because he’s just too damn stubborn to listen to medical professionals and team officials (his bosses) to watch his weight. I think that’s true especially when you consider that he showed up after the first reporting date for spring training while coming off of his worst career season, where he had a slash line of .245/.292/.366.

He’s not the first athlete in Beantown whose weight has been the topic of media and franchise scrutiny. You guys remember former Celtics forward Glen ‘Big Baby’ Davis? He had his fair share of issues with his body mass, too. Unlike the Red Sox, the Celtics handled it pretty well through contract clauses. He, unlike Kung Fu Panda, has shown some actual work ethic and has shown that he takes pride in his profession. Regardless though, he’s a big man.

This got Sean and I thinking… who wins in an eating contest? Let’s check it out…

 

Tale of the Tape:

 

In this corner…Pablo ‘Kung Fu Panda’ Sandoval:

Age 29, Favorite Food- Lasagna

Height- 5’11”, Weight- 255 lbs. (yeah, right)

Sandoval Fat 1.jpg

And in this corner… Glen ‘Big Baby’ Davis:

Age 30, Favorite Food- Tofu

Height- 6’9”, Weight- 289 lbs.

Big Baby.jpg

Big Baby, on the surface, has the advantage of pure size, since he’s almost a full foot taller. So yeah, chances are that the man will weigh more. I’ll cede that. But this isn’t a size contest, it’s an eating contest. Think about it this way… Sandoval only weighs 34 pounds lighter at 10 inches shorter. He has 88% of Big Baby’s mass. Does that sound healthy to you? That’s a pretty big gut!

Plus, check out their favorite foods. Now, I like me some lasagna, okay? I’m not bullying Sandoval; I’m just looking for some facts. And the amount of carbs in lasagna plus my doubt that he hits the gym as much as he should lead me to believe that he can pack it in pretty good. He also has proven that he likes fried foods, like empanadas (sounds pretty good, by the way).

Big Baby, on the other hand, has moved to a vegan lifestyle, which is cool I guess. Either way, he’s gotten so far away from fried and fatty foods that I’m not sure he could hang.

I’m taking Pablo Sandoval in this one, depending, of course, on the type of food that is being served. Hot dogs, hamburgers, chicken? Probably Pablo. Salad? I’ll put my money on Glen Davis. What do you guys think? Let me hear it and vote below.

Disclaimer– I don’t hate #48 because of his weight. I hate him for his lack of work ethic, his unwillingness to change, his irresponsibility and above all, the fact that he doesn’t care about any of it. It doesn’t help that he has a reputation as a bad teammate. So I don’t feel bad about writing this article in the slightest.

Cover Photo courtesy of Getty Images.

Other photos courtesy of larrybrownsports.com  and the NY Daily News.

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